I cannot control:
His Will
My desire TO control His will
The overwhelming fear that is creeping in more steadily as her surgery gets nearer
My mom's pain and helplessness
The pain and helplessness I feel KNOWING she is in pain
The mental games that repeat in my head
That for every positive point, there is at least one to negate it
My tears
My fears
My dad's tears
My mom's fears
My kids questions
The words I fear he'll say when he talks to us after her surgery
The questions
That when cancer is mentioned I can't think positively
Thinking about what if
Cancer-I cannot control the possibility that my mom might have cancer.
4 comments:
Here's what you can control: Choosing to trust God no matter what. I'm praying for you and your mom.
All of our thoughts and prayers for all of you --you are right, you cannot control His will or much about this situation. But as Robin said, you can control how you try and get through this. I pray that you will find peace and comfort in knowing that God has your mom in His healing hands and whatever lies in store for her, He will provide the means by which all of you will be able to support and help each other. Peace to all of you from the Baldwin family!
I cannot say it better than Robin and Christine. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Love you guys.
Been thinking of you all this weekend. Know that we are praying for the best news and outcome.
-A big long-distance {hug}
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